Tuesday, 22 August 2017

Crying Baby or Pressurized Parents?

There has been an irked debate going on - on the Viral Video of a small girl crying and the mother teaching her in a harsh way.

When I saw the video, I didn't find anything wrong....I guessed the mother was teaching and I presumed that the child would be very playful and would not be learning at all. Not a very difficult situation to understand. Not that I didn't feel bad for the baby, but I guess every mother knows what's best for her child. She is the mother after all!

Many of my friends didn't like the video followed by many cricketers who condemned it.

Some may see it as it is, some may see beyond.

I choose to see beyond!

I have personally been at that mother's place many a times. I am crazy about my daughter. I love her beyond any description of words. There has been times when I have been a little harsh, given a few slaps to make her learn.

If you really want to stop all's better to question the right things!
  • ·         Why so much pressure on parents to teach children, isn't school for teaching?
  • ·         Why a mother, of all people, hitting her child for teaching small little things?

Because Boss, this is India and right from nursery, you have about three books to be done. And just in any case you don't learn at pace of the best student of the class, you are labelled!

Weak in studies, weak student, doesn't concentrate, no focus, very playful, you should take care, very bad attitude and what not!

Schools are no more Gurukul, it is a business centre. There are 30-40 kids in one class and one/two teachers handle the entire class. Now, the class run at the pace of the best child's learning speed. Everyone needs to gear up. Leave the best student, the teacher has a topic to teach in class, and Vrrooom! The topic is done. The question/answers are also done. Next topic please!

It is difficult for all the kids to understand any topic or as a matter of fact, learn 1 to 5 at same pace. Some pay attention, they learn! Some are extremely playful, they lag behind. So, what if they lag behind?

  • ·         There are reminders in the child's dairy that his performance is below average.
  • ·         For the primary or high school children, there are extra classes in school...on a Saturday which is actually a non-working day for the kids.
  • ·         Worst of worst, children are divided into sections according to their ranks. The best ones or the cream students, as they are called, in section A and the "weak students" in section D/E/F(last one).

Can you even imagine the moral of a student who is in section D/E/F?  They know that entire school knows that they are weak students. These kids know that it's just not their parents who know that they are weak in studies, but every every parent has a easy way to find that out.

Random Uncle: Beta, tum kis section mein ho?
Child: Uncle, E!
Random uncle gives a degrading-sadistic look and says, "hmmmm, arre beta kabhi kabhi padh bhi liya karo!"

Trust me on this, it all happens!

It doesn't ends there. No no! There is much more to this - the syllabus....Oh myyyy God!

Can you just can't imagine a child who is 5, who doesn't know how to clean his own potty, is learning *@&%!*  FRENCH in school.


My own niece and nephew are in standard 1, and looking at their syllabus, I feel, they will be 10-board-ready by next year. No, I am not kidding! These kids come back from school, eat and when they are about to finish their lunch, their tuition teacher comes. There is so much homework from school or there is test every Wednesday or some exam or competition, that they have to study for hours, after school. By the time they are done, it is already 7 PM. Eat, sleep and repeat. Really! 

In this race, if a mother is hitting her child to teach, is she wrong?

She is not, she can't be!

She is also scared, my child shouldn't be labelled. My child has all the capability then why will she be labelled. Same goes for me or for my didi or bhabhi or for any lady who yells, hits, pressurizes her child to put more focus on study.

If you really want to question.....don't go at the teaching style, please see the back drop!

Hope you leave the mother daughter video and end this debate. Hope you start the new one - Why so much pressure Boss? Bache hai, ease it out!


  1. Wow.. wonderfully written Swarn.. totally agree with the feelings you have put up here.. why so much pressure on the kids and the parents eventually.. I seriously don't want to send my kid to a school rather want to keep him at a preschool where he can just play n have fun.. have been through this pressure as kids.. don't want ours to suffer the same way!

    1. yes true too want my children to learn but not in a pressurized way.

  2. It's really wow. True picture of India educational system. I love this blog and you have shown the true picture of our society and the educational business which is growing in India.

    1. Yes ... my BP goes high every time i teach your child.